A Bachelor's Complaint on Behavior of Married People by Charles Lamb
kindly play following video for summary in Gujarati:
Lamb has discovered a number of
weaknesses in married people and has therefore found much consolation in his
state of bachelor-hood. It is not the quarrels of husbands and wives that
console him for having remained unmarried.
What offends him at the houses of married persons is that they are
pretending as they are in love. He has found that a husband and a wife
constantly try to produce the impression that they are very fond of each
other. This display of married happiness
is an insult to a bachelor. If a man enjoys some monopoly, he should keep it as
much out of sight as possible so that others may not question his right to the
monopoly. But married people go out of their way to make bachelors conscious of
the monopoly of marriage, which they enjoy. They air of complete satisfaction
which a newly married couple wear on their faces is especially offensive to
Lamb.
Lamb
does not understand why married people should be excessively proud of their
children. After all, children are not a rarity. In fact, the poorest people
have the largest number of children. Besides, children often go wrong and prove
to be a cause of much disappointment to their parents. Married people's pride
in their children is, therefore, hardly justified. Married people are still less justified in
expecting a bachelor to show a fond attention to their children. Why should a
bachelor shower his affection on children? If a bachelor shows too much
interest in children, their parents quickly send them out of the room. A
bachelor therefore, finds himself on the horns of a dilemma in dealing with towards
children. Should he or should he no, adopt a loving attitude towards children?
If he should, what is to be the degree of the affection to all their eight,
nine or ten children. There is certainly a proverb: "Love me, love my
dog". But while it is possible to love a friend's dog or any other article
that reminds a man of his friend, it may not be possible always to love a
friend's children because children have a separate existence of their
individual natures and temperaments. Lamb says that it has never been possible
for him to feel affection for women and children indiscriminately.
Very
soon after getting married, a man tends to become in different to a
bachelor-friend no matter how long was the duration of friendship before the
marriage. No wife can tolerate her husband's bachelor-friend if the friendship
dates back to her pre-marriage days. No matter how long a man had been friendly
with her husband before her marriage, she will so manage that her husband will
before long become cool and distant towards him.
Women
adopt different ways to bring to an end the friendship between their husbands
and the bachelors with whom they may have had intimate relations before
marriage. A wife may laugh with a kind
of wonder at everything that her husband's bachelor-friend may say. By her
laughter she may produce the impression that her husband's friend is an oddity
or a humorist, not fit to be introduced to ladies. Or, a wife may keep
exaggerating the particular qualities of her husband's fiend in such a way that
the husband's enthusiasm for his friend cools down. There is irony in this kind
of exaggeration on the part of a wife. Another technique employed by a wife is
to ask with a kind of innocent towards him. And became the basis of the
friendship. By this method a wife tries to make her husband feel that he was
mistaken in his assessment of his friend's qualities.
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